Overall all I've found the study of Haybron's book on happiness very interesting during this season in my life. I personally started to struggle with anxiety a few years ago and the last couple of years of balancing marriage, starting a business, maintaining my 9-5 and grad school have been interesting to say the least. While I definitely have many happy moments this season of my life has been filled with many ups and downs so studying the concept of what is happiness really appealed to me.
While I personally don't believe that life is just about being happy. I believe our lives are all constantly in a state of fluctuations when it comes to our level of happiness. The primary thing I've tried to keep in my life has been peace. Now more than ever I've found it's been important to remove things and people out of my life that disturb my peace and that is honestly is more important to me than my state of happiness. So although being happy feels great, learning to have peace in my life regardless of my circumstances is ultimately what I strive for daily.
With that said, some of the remaining chapters from Haybron's happiness that I really enjoyed were the sources of happiness in chapter 5, meaning: connecting with what matters in chapter 7. In chapter 5 Haybron stated that the sources of happiness are SOARS- security, outlook, autonomy, relationships and skilled meaningful activity. Haybron stated that the idea of security is pretty the plainest necessity of overall happiness but can be a bit more complicated than face value.
I very much agree with this. While I do believe security is essential to daily life and happiness, I also think that some of the material security, as well as modern luxuries we all strive for may be taking away from our happiness. We live in a society of more, more, more, like more money and things are going to make us happy. But sometimes I think the striving to do and accomplish more sometimes is taking away from the happiness we're actually seeking.
In chapter 7 I found the section on meaning and connecting with what matters particularly interesting because of Haybron's discussion on not just being good but connecting with worthwhile people and pursuits. He mentioned that in recent years studies have shown that people with kids are not necessarily happier. That having children may actually take away from happiness and that people with children were very upset with these studies. While he did say many researchers said that these studies were wrong I found this very interesting as a married women with no children who has no plans to have children. Too often I've been made to feel bad about my decision by friends or family and I often question why because I am happy with my decision. So like Haybron, I do believe there may be a bit of truth to these studies.
My first free-association with Haybron's little book, whenever I think of it, is that scene he describes with his father, on the water. The feeling it evokes is one of deep contentment and peace. And perhaps security. The ability to conjure that sort of feeling through personal memory is no small part of our happiness, I think. I found myself reflecting on that, on how small but pleasing memories can trigger happy thoughts and feelings, in my blog post this morning. https://jposopher.blogspot.com/2022/03/getting-up-early.html
ReplyDeleteAs for children: it's impossible for me to believe we'd have been happier without them (my wife and I), but I'm sure there are plenty of people for whom life without progeny is fine. I'm equally sure that our children have made my life more joyous and meaningful. I can't imagine life without them.
Fortunately there are many roads to happiness and fulfillment.
What do you want to read next? Russell's Conquest of Happiness? Something else? Whatever you choose, do please continue to read and comment on each others' posts.
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